I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize