The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
