Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
