What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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