Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
