4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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