I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Randomize
