whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Randomize
