I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
