Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
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