what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
