She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
Randomize
