before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Randomize
