if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Randomize
