thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
