I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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