well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize