We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
