Duck Duck Cougar?
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Randomize
