Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Randomize