I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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