they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
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