I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
