everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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