Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I just want nice things and good sex
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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