They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
