just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
I currently don't understand fingers.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
