then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
