All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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