my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
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