no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Randomize
