The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
false alarm. still invincible.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
