I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize