Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
We have started to decorate penises.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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