His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
i black out too much to be "responsible"
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Randomize
