just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize