You're a womanizer and a bitch.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
