sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
operation harelip BJ is a go
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
