There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
