.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
