Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Randomize
