I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
