Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Randomize
