What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
