So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
