You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Acid is not a monday night drug
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize