OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
