where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
