Yo dont text me then not text me
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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