This girl is more easily done than said...
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
