not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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